In einem Video, welches ich gerade nicht mehr finde wurden Unterschiede zwischen Jungs und Mädchen bei Aggression und Mobbing/Bullysein dargestellt, zitiert nach Dr. Leonard Sax. Die Punkte, die ich interessant fand, waren:
- Jungs, die sich prügeln, können (auch dadurch) danach friedlich miteinander spielen. Jungs lernen, wenn man sie eine „gesunde Rauferei“ ausführen lässt, auch wie man „fair kämpft“ und das kann ein wichtiger Teil ihrer Sozialisiation sein.
- Jungs, die echte Bullys sind, haben das häufig gerade nicht gelernt. Sie halten sich nicht an die Regeln und nutzen etwa Kraftvorteile aus. Sie stehen meist recht niedrig in einer Hierarchie, weil niemand mit ihnen etwas zu tun haben möchte.
- Mädchen, die miteinander aggressiv werden, werden selten Freundinnen und bleiben demnach Feinde.
- Mädchen Bullys sind eher sehr hoch in der Hierachie, haben sozialen Einfluss und Macht und nutzen diesen aus, um andere fertig zu machen. Sie wirken oft gut eingegliedert und machtvoll.
Auf der Suche dazu habe ich auch noch diesen Text von Sax dazu gefunden:
We explore the different motivations underlying each of these behaviors.
- What is the most common reason why boys bully other boys? Because they enjoy it.
- What’s the most common reason why girls bully other girls? Because they perceive a threat to their social niche and they are trying to defend their niche.
- “Hate”-based bullying is motivated by differences in race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc. Although this kind of bullying receives a disproportionate amount of press coverage, it is empirically much less common than either boy-on-boy bullying or girl-on-girl bullying.
- Sexual harassment is fundamentally different from the three other categories because the origins and motivations are so different. Sexual harassment often begins when a student’s romantic or sexual advances toward another student are rebuffed or mocked. To understand sexual harassment in schools today, one must begin with the fact that girls and boys today often don’t really understand the rules of good behavior; or they may know the rules but they have no interest in following those rules. Many students are immersed in popular culture, the culture of Eminem, Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga and Rihanna. The Eminem subculture is different from the Justin Bieber subculture, which is different from the John Mayer subculture; but all those subcultures actively encourage boys to be arrogant and disrespectful. The Lady Gaga subculture is different from the Rihanna subculture which is different from the NickiMinaj subculture; but all those subcultures actively promote the idea that modest girls are uncool, that chastity is uncool, that a girl has to be a skank to be cool. See my recent essay on this topic for Psychology Today, online at www.psychologytoday.com/node/121388.
Next we consider who is the bully and who is the victim in each of these kinds of bullying. In boy-on-boy bullying, the bully and the victim usually come from different social groups. The boy bully is usually, though not always, bigger and physically stronger than his victim. The victim is often a “gender-atypical” boy. these boys share a number of characteristics which distinguish them from ‘mainstream’ boys (for the relevant scholarly citations, please see Why Gender Matters, chapter 9):
- These boys may be athletically talented, but if so, they tend to prefer tennis, track, or golf, rather than football or soccer. They don’t like to hit or to be hit. By contrast, many gender-typical boys will play games such as “How about I hit you as hard as I can, then you hit me as hard as you can?” The gender-atypical boy doesn’t want to play such games; that’s sometimes how the boy-on-boy bullying begins.
- These boys are more likely to suffer from allergies, asthma, and eczema
- These boys are more likely to be precocious, particularly with regard to language
- These boys are NOT more likely to be homosexual.Sexual orientation is an independent parameter. The muscular boy who plays football is just as likely as other boys to be homosexual; and the gender-atypical boy is no more likely than other boys to be homosexual (for more on this point, see Why Gender Matters, pp. 203-213 and pp. 223-228).
In girl-on-girl bullying, the girl and the victim often come from the same social circle. In many cases, Sonia and Vanessa were friends, sometimes even best friends; then suddenly Sonia begins a campaign of bullying against Vanessa. Sonia also tries to get her friends to be mean to Vanessa. The most common precipitant is some event which causes Sonia to perceive Vanessa as a threat to Sonia’s social niche. Sometimes the precipitating event is obvious, for example if Sonia’s boyfriend shows a romantic interest in Vanessa. Sometimes it’s more subtle: for example, a friend might say “Did you hear what Vanessa did? It was SO funny. Hysterical! She is SUCH a clown.” If Sonia perceives her own role as the being the clown in her social circle, and a friend gives Vanessa the title of clown, Sonia may feel that her own niche is threatened. Sonia may not realize that there is room for more than one girl in that niche. After all, Sonia is not an adult woman; she does not have the judgment and perspective that an adult has. (The consensus of current brain research is that girls don’t reach full maturity in brain development until around 22 years of age; boys don’t reach full maturity until 5 to 8 years later, age 27 to 30.)
The boy bully is often easy to recognize. Boys who bully are less socially sophisticated, on average, than boys who don’t. But that’s not true for girls. Girls who bully are often more socially sophisticated than girls who don’t; and girls who bully are often especially adept with adults. As a result, adults who have not been trained in these differences often don’t perceive the girl-on-girl bullying which is going on in front of them.
Meint ihr, dass past?